One day I decided to go for a walk...

POSTCARDS FROM ME

Today I’ve been working on my packing for our upcoming Camino…and I’ve been in a bit of a panic. The first Camino was a challenge because I’d never walked one before and I didn’t know what to bring for six weeks of walking. It took a lot research, talking to others who had walked one, watching videos, consulting with Glen, and more. All that research made it easier for Camino 2 and Camino 3. The template was created. But this time is different.

This Camino is Portugal, not the Frances. Some of my clothes have worn out. I’m different…shoulder surgery has made carrying my pack tenuous. My template isn’t working this time. However I know that by definition, I will be packed before we get on the plane and Portugal isn’t some isolated village; there are grocery stores and pharmacies in case I forget something.

So today I’m taking a little break and addressing envelopes so I can send postcards to my grandchildren. Yes I send all my postcards in envelopes because I have this fear that every postal worker will read them and it will take forever to arrive :-/. I particularly like to send cards with the map of the Camino so I can mark where we are when I mail the card.

When I walked the first Camino I even sent myself eight postcards. They were messages to me showing that not all my fears were coming true and those that did were not nearly as disastrous as I anticipated. There were unexpected joys and delights along the way. Some of what I wrote is too personal to share, but I will share one of them with you.

10-11-2019 Santiago de Compostela

Dear Michelle,

It has been a long journey to Santiago and you made it. You made new friends and learned new things about yourself. You are strong. You helped a man uphill with his bike. You don’t have everything figured out but you are changed. You must believe in yourself and not let doubts overcome you. YOU WALKED 500 MILES. That is an amazing feat. I love you and I love who you are becoming 🙂

Wow! I love that woman. And I love the woman who wrote those words to her. Perhaps I should write her some more postcards about this new Camino she is about to embark on.

Maybe you’ll write yourself a postcard with lots of loving affirmations. You are worth it.

Buen Camino

GREAT EXPECTATIONS

5 Day Academy for Spiritual Formation
St. George’s Island, GA
May 2025

I’ve been preparing myself for walking the Camino Portuguese mostly by taking walks, reading memoirs, and working out at the gym. Last week I added something else. I returned to a Five Day Academy for Spiritual Formation to prepare my spirit for this walk.

On my first Camino in 2019 I had no idea what to expect and I deliberately tried to not formulate any expectations. I had a wonderful time on that Camino. I encountered the Holy in so many places and at surprising times. The tinkle of a cow’s bell still takes me back to the Pyrenees where I first felt that I was walking on sacred ground. Or the time I walked past a 14th century convent that had been converted into a hostal and heard a sort of angelic music only to turn the corner to find a colorful cafe/bar serving pilgrims.

That was my first Camino and I maintained a “no expectations” frame of mind for subsequent walks because I remember at the first Five Day Academy I attended one of our speakers said that we make a mistake asking God to “do it again God, do it again”. because the spiritual experience was so wonderful. But while we’re asking God to “do it again” God is saying, “I have something even more wonderful for you.” That has always stuck with me. I don’t want to relegate God to one experience. I believe God is dynamic and creative and I don’t want to miss anything that God chooses to grace me with.

Full disclosure…sometimes I do want God to “do it again!” 🤫🤭

Buen Camino

AT LAST OR NOW

At last or now

It’s been over a year since I last wrote. Almost every day I ask myself, “Do I have something to say or is it time to bring this blog to a quiet and dignified end?”

So much has happened and I yearned to write about this past year of my life Camino, but it seemed too personal like laying out all my shit. And trust me during a gastrointestinal illness there were months of that. See that was TMI, but it was a part of my awful year. So I’ll give you the expurgated version…

*My cousin in Paris died. She had no will and she was a hoarder. I spent a month dealing with this and more than a year later there is still no resolution to her estate.

*Colds, the flu, and the above mentioned issues plagued me one after the other.

*After returning from the last camino I had tremendous pain in my knees, hips, and right shoulder. I saw a doctor and mentioned my lower extremities. He told me I had over worked my body and just needed to rest. I never mentioned the shoulder and it never got better. After 8 months of pain I had surgery. My rotator cuff was completely severed and donor tissue was needed to make the connection.

*Then the depression…Will I ever be able to walk the Camino again?

The great bright spot was the arrival of a sixth grandchild.

So amidst all the crap the arrival of this little bundle of happiness (and he is so stinking happy) I made it through this year.

Then something happened. My friend Dianne, whom I met on my first camino, wrote to tell me she was going to walk the Camino Portuguese from Porto to Santiago de Compostelle, about 170 miles. Surely I could do that. Even with a bad shoulder I could have my pack sent ahead if I couldn’t bear to carry it. I’m going to walk it.

So that’s the summation of my past year. See? There was no reason to complain about my ailments and sadness week after week. I’ve got it all out and now I can focus on training and preparing for the next camino.

I know I talk about the camino a lot and it has truly become part of who I am. After the first camino I realized that my whole life is a camino and even though I believe that to be true, I know that I’m not done with the walking. So now I’m looking forward to this fall engaging a new trail and experiencing the magic of the camino anew.

Buen Camino

COMING HOME

13 October 2023

Home

Saturday I left Santiago by train to Madrid. My flight home was Sunday, October 8th. I travelled by myself because Glen had a business trip to Holland scheduled. I feel bad for him. He left the peace of the camino and jumped right back into his hectic world.

I have the gift of coming home to a quiet house, a shower in my own bathroom, and sleep in my own bed 🥰. Bliss

I remember 4 years ago coming home and driving the next day to Pittsburgh because my daughter was watching Pico for me and I was anxious to bring him home. Actually I was a little afraid that he would forget me after 6 weeks 😮.

The trees along the highway were a fall rainbow of colors: orange, brown, yellow, and in between variations. It was beautiful and after the quiet walking of the camino it was more than my senses could bear. It was like a buffet of all my favorite foods but I was cramming so much in my mouth that it made me feel sick. Too much all at once.

Two years ago and last Sunday it was different. I was prepared. I knew what to expect. I had the knowledge of the transition ahead of me.

And so I’ve decided to revel in that transition. I’m taking things slow. Luckily Pico was only a 5 minute drive away. I let myself sleep and eat when I need to and my body, while still adjusting, is almost back to this time zone.

It’s been a quiet time of processing all that happened on this camino and I’m still processing. While I miss my time in Spain I’m glad to be home. I’m re-entering my real life…? Regular life? Everyday life? I don’t know what to call it. I suppose it’s my life through a camino filter.

I’m the meantime I’ll be planning my next camino 😊

Buen Camino

TWO DAYS TO SANTIAGO

3 October 2023, Camino 3, Day 34

Melide to Arzua

It’s cool (60 degrees) and a bit humid this morning. It feels good walking but stopping for a drink it seems chilly.

It’s a short walk to Arzua which is good. My ankle has been acting up and I welcome a reduction in kilometers.

I walked for a bit with a young woman who reminds me a great deal of my own daughters. She’s newly graduated from college and beginning to send out resumes. And she’s a little torn about which direction her heart is calling her to.

With more than 40 years difference between us I find myself asking the same questions. Should I continue writing this blog? Should I try to change it into a book? A podcast? A children’s book? I thought I was dispensing elderly wisdom and I find all the same questions coming back at me. Sure I have my Medicare card and sure potential employers might be concerned about the longevity of my work life, but does any of that matter?

I may live another 40 years or I may get hit by a bus 🚌 tomorrow. The question is still what am I going to do next? And truthfully this is precisely the question I brought with me on the Camino. It’s the question I prayed into my rock that I laid at the base of Cruz de Fierro. What am I going to do next? Or better yet who am I going to be?

Buen Camino

FOUR DAYS TO SANTIAGO

1 October 2023, Camino 3, Day 32

Portomarin to Palais de Rei

Full disclosure: I am not walking to Palais de Rei today. Yesterday was a very tough day. The walk itself was not too bad but the heat was brutal. In addition walking into Portomarin is a very steep downhill followed by a very steep up hill.

Not only is one faced with these steps but the town is a constant incline throughout. I made it to within 30 feet of our hotel when I absolutely had to take off my pack and sit and…well…I fainted. I’m ok. Some cold water on my face and to drink revived me. And here is where I want to talk about the kindness of people on the camino. The owner of the hotel came out offering all kinds of assistance, including calling an ambulance. Later she called to ask how I was and her husband (a doctor) asked some questions to get the full picture of the situation and told us to call at anytime if things got bad. Later one of the other residents stopped by at the owner’s request to lay eyes on me and report back. I felt very cared for.

The pilgrims office requires two stamps per day for the last 100 km as additional proof of having walked them. Only after that proof will they issue a Pilgrim’s Compostela.

So I’m sure you’ve already noticed that I’m taking a taxi and therefore I am not walking today. I’m really not all that fussed about getting a third compostela. However I want to frame my pilgrim’s credential (passport) and I would like to have the final Pilgrims’ stamp from Santiago. So yes, I’m going to lie in front of God and everybody in the pilgrim’s office about today. I’m relying of the grace of God and not God’s judgment.

Buen Camino

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My first stamp today from the cathedral in Palais de Rei

FIVE DAYS TO SANTIAGO

30 September 2023, Camino 3, Day 31

Sarria to Portomarin

Today was everything I expected and more.

There were all sorts of groups of people. Groups of men being loud, teenagers sitting on the roadside texting, and more. And when I say more I mean something more interesting possibly. There is a group of men traveling in matching shirts. Yesterday they were orange and today they were blue. This evening I noticed they were pink.

The thing I found most curious was the design on their shirts.

Their t-shirts all have St. James on the front in black and white stripes.

I have heard of low level prisoners being given the option of walking the camino instead of prison time because the Camino is a life altering event. I certainly believe it has an impact on my life but never considered it might be used to rehabilitate criminals. Perhaps our own judicial system should consider something like this. Perhaps

It was a beautiful walk today.

I’ll have to add my stamps tomorrow as I forgot to photograph them 😢

Buen Camino

THREE DAYS TO SANTIAGO

2 October 2023, Camino 3, Day 33

Palais de Rei to Melide

Today we are walking the Primativo route to Melide where we will rejoin the Frances route. It is the oldest of the routes to Santiago and the route that the king of Spain took to pay homage to the bones of St. James which were discovered in the 9th century by a hermit who had a dream.

Of course all of this is the stuff of legends and folklore. There is no proof that St. James (of the brothers James and John in the Bible) was ever in Spain. The story is that he was be headed in Jerusalem and two of his disciples recovered his bodily parts and set sail for Spain in a stone boat held afloat by scallop shells.

Thus the scallop shell as symbol of the camino.

St. James never walked the Camino de Santiago (Spanish for St. James).

But I’ve been thinking about a lot of other things as my time on the camino draws to a close. Two years ago I really pondered “what do you think when you’re alone with your thoughts”? I had a lot of time to think about that as that was the camino I walked alone.

I think a lot about dreams I had when I was younger like owning a small restaurant. I know that time has passed so I think about how I might live out that dream in another way. I think a lot about my grandchildren and the memories I want to make with them. After all when I’m gone, memories of me are all they will have.

What do you dream about? What do you think when you’re alone with your thoughts. Who do you want to be? Not do…be.

Tell me your dreams and hopes.

Buen Camino

ONE DAY TO SANTIAGO

4 October 2023, Camino 3, Day 35

Arzua to O Pedrouzo

It’s a beautiful day today. The weather is cool, the path shady with bits of mild sunshine, rolling hills, and good traction on the road. About 13 miles to O Pedrouzo. It is the last day before the last day.

I have walked alone much of the morning. My feelings are all jumbled up. I’m sad the walk is almost over. I’m happy the walk is almost over. I’m yearning to return to my home and I’ll miss Spain. It’s like trying to mix oil and vinegar. No matter how much you shake it it will never mesh together. So for now I’ll try to sit with the conflict within me.

Buen Camino

There were two nuns on the outskirts of Arzua giving stamps and asking for donations for the Daughters of Santa Maria. My nun was very young and she kept asking where we were from. Someone would say “ Canada” and I said “United States” and she would point and repeat where we were from. It was all very charming.

SANTIAGO

5 October 2023, Camino 3, Day 36

O Pedrouzo to Santiago

Glen and I have had a little joke along the camino. When we are close to our destination and need to push through he says, “Let’s finish this thing before it gets out of hand.” Well today we’re going to finish it.

The day has been cool (really almost cold), misty, and overcast. We ploughed on and the walk was actually easy. I had butterflies in my stomach when I woke up but as the day progressed I felt a peace come over me. I don’t really care for the walk into Santiago. It’s a couple of kilometers to get to the old part of town where the cathedral is.

The entrance to the new part of Santiago de Compostela

The meaning of Santiago de Compostela is St. James under a field of stars because in the 8th century the monk who had a dream about the location of the bones of St. James envisioned them under a starred filled sky. Under a field of stars…such a beautiful image.

As you enter the old cathedral square you must pass through an arch. There is almost always someone greeting pilgrims by playing the bagpipes. Bagpipes originated in Africa and migrated into Spain. Later when the Spanish set sail for Northern Europe they landed in Ireland and brought these Celtic traditions with them.

But we didn’t stop at the cathedral. Our first stop was at the pilgrim’s office. We had heard that each day 1400 pilgrims arrive in Santiago and the majority of them will head to the pilgrim’s office to get their compostellas…the certificate of completion of the camino.

Our fear was that they might tell us to come back in a day or two because the line was so long. That was not the case. There were actually only about 30 pilgrims ahead of us in line so we got in quickly.

I will upload my Compostela and my certificate of distance in another post as I will need to scan them.

There is so much more to our arrival than the bare facts I’ve laid out here. I’m going to need some time to process my feelings more fully. I’ll be taking the next few days off as we travel by train to Madrid and then fly home.

Thank you so much for being part of this journey with me.

Buen Camino