13 Now when Jesus came into the district of Caesarea Philippi, he asked his disciples, “Who do people say that the Son of Man is?” 14 And they said, “Some say John the Baptist, but others Elijah, and still others Jeremiah or one of the prophets.” 15 He said to them, “But who do you say that I am?” 16 Simon Peter answered, “You are the Messiah,[a] the Son of the living God.” 17 And Jesus answered him, “Blessed are you, Simon son of Jonah! For flesh and blood has not revealed this to you, but my Father in heaven. Matthew 16:13-17 NRSV

I have always been uncomfortable with titles. I am ordained. I went to seminary and eventually followed the ordination process in a mainline protestant denomination. I wanted to wear my title of Reverend but I never really felt comfortable with it.* I don’t really want to be call “Mrs” either.

I do have names that I’m comfortable with. I like being called “mommy”. I know that seems like a childish name and I’m sure my adult daughters feel silly calling me that. However when they began calling me “mom” I felt the name didn’t really fit me and I asked them to please call me mommy at least at home. Lady M is my grandma name. My daughters helped me pick that out. It’s not that I was adverse to being called “grandma” its that I didn’t want to be “grandma Michelle” or Grandma P”. I’ll never forget the first time I heard my first grandchild say, “D’M”. That name does have a bit of a draw back. When that same grandchild was older I took her to the children’s museum. I lost sight of her for a few minutes and then I heard someone say, “Are you here with your mommy?” “No, Lady M”. “Are you here with your grandma?” “No Lady M”. We found each other.

Recently I attended the American Pilgrims on the Camino Gathering where I joined 300 others to prepare for, reminisce about, learn about, and celebrate the Camino de Santiago. We were all referred to as “pilgrims”. I am embracing that name.

Recently (yesterday actually) I gave myself permission to try out a new name. I haven’t looked at my LinkedIn profile in over 10 years (since I left the church). Occasionally I get an email regarding my former clergy status. I recently received an invitation from a Women in Leadership group to join. When I wrote back and told them that I was no longer clergy I never received a reply back. So yesterday I finally decided to update my profile. LinkedIn has a lot of information that one must filled in and one of those is “title”. Rather than put down Mommy or Lady M or even Pilgrim I went out on a limb and typed in “Blogger”. I felt scared as I typed that in because…

Maybe I don’t blog often enough to be called a blogger.

Maybe I don’t have enough followers to be called a blogger.

Maybe what I write isn’t interesting enough to be called a blogger.

So there you have it. Blogger is a new name I’ve appropriated. I’m going to see if it fits. I’m going to try and live in to it. I’m going to say, “I’m a blogger” when someone asks what I do. If I find blogger doesn’t feel genuine like reverend didn’t, I can let it go. But who knows as Peter called Jesus “Messiah” maybe one day someone will call me “Blogger”. And I’ll answer.

Who do say you are?

Buen Camino

*I have since left the Church and am no longer affiliated with any organized church. However I’m pretty sure that my ordination came from God and not the Bishop.

Published by michelleperram

I am me, a person with love for others, a passion to be creative, and a desire to be a cheerleader for others. I’m a wife, a mommy, and a grandma (you can call me by my grandma name “Lady M”). I’m on a search to grow and connect more fully with God. I didn’t grow up particularly church, married a man who had, and we raised our three daughters in the church. I found a place to belong in the church and somehow discerned a call to go to seminary. I received a Masters of Arts and Religious Communication (MARC). I went on to become ordained as a deacon in the United Methodist Church and served in media ministry and Christian education. As clergy I found that I didn’t have a place to belong in the church so I left the United Methodist Church in 2010. I still believe and I’m still on a quest to draw closer to God. And I’m going to walk the Camino de Santiago.

3 thoughts on “WHO DO YOU SAY THAT I AM?

  1. Great blog, Michelle.  Blogger fits, as do the names you have carefully appropriated!Blessings,Barb 

  2. I read your post when it came up but didn’t have a chance to comment on it. This is a fascinating discussion you are having with yourself. My granddaughter calls me Ouma(Afrikaans for grandma). When I pick her up, she calls from afar: “Oumaaaa.” I feel so loved by her. My son never called me Mamma; it is still up to today only Ma. As soon as you have a blog, you may call yourself a “blogger”. The same with when you do some writing which you did in this case you may call yourself a writer because that’s what you are.

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